A Trip To ToxiCity

Considerable hangover

Substances: CPP, BZP, TFMPP

9:05PM
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        Just swallowed a gelcap containing 110mg of BZP, 60mg of TFMPP,
and 25mg of mCPP. I significantly dropped the dosages of BZP and TFMPP
from what I used the last time, since I am adding in a new compound, mCPP.
The problem with piperazines is that there seems to be a wide range of
opinions regarding dosage and effects. Dosages people recommend vary
widely, for example with BZP, I've seen "50-100mg" and I've seen
"500-600mg"... and effects described are also very inconsistent. To some
people, piperazines are the next best thing to MDMA. Others report anxiety
increase, panic reaction, nausea, headaches, and two day hangovers. I also
get the impression that a lot of the information about piperazines is
deliberately misleading, with bias running strongly in both directions.
        mCPP is described by some sources as adding the "body sensations"
aspect of the piperazine MDMA-like cocktail. We'll see how it compares to
the BZP/TFMPP combo.

9:35PM
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        Feeling something definate now. Similar to the come-on I felt last
time. Kind of like a phenethylamine come-on but with a little more
anxiety, which I think is largely psychosomatic. I opt to take 2.5g of GHB
and smoke a little cannabis. I'm starting to feel a little bit of that
warmth in my chest that I felt last time.
        I do think there is something a little different, but I can't
quite tell yet. Too early in the game.

9:50PM
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        Definately picking up... I'm starting to get some beginnings of
visuals, and some body sensations. So far, it feels pretty similar to what
I did last week. The body sensations are somehow different - but I'm not
quite sure how, yet. Some mild stomach discomfort, like I felt transiently
last time - I think if I focused on it, it could become nausea... but its
very easy to ignore. It is similar to MDMA induced stomach queasiness that
some people get, and which I can occasionally get from higher doses. I've
never thrown up from MDMA however, so this will probably be similar in
that regards. So far, this seems pretty nice.

10:15PM
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        The stomach discomfort developed into some mild nausea, but this
passed. The trick is not to think about it... it seems to be largely a
psychologically induced nausea. Thinking about it can make it get
significantly worse, ignoring it makes it dissipate. Not worth writing
about any further.
        Smoking some cannabis is definately enhancing the effects.

11:05PM
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        T+2h now... This is nice. Similar to last time... a little milder,
I think, due to lower BZP and TFMPP dosages. The mCPP does seem to have
introduced a new dimension to the experience. A warm flushing sensation.
This seems a little less psychedelic that my my last experiment - dosage?
Seems to be a little more body load.

11:35PM
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        T+2.5h... I should be at peak plasma levels now. The effects don't
really seem to be increasing anymore. My, that take off was a little
rough... I think that either mCPP does not like me, or 25mg was too
much... or, of course, it could all have been in my head. There was mild,
but very noticable nausea, combined with a general feeling best described
as "Ugh..." for about an hour.
        Now, I feel pretty nice. It is a little different, bodywise, than
my experiment using just BZP and TFMPP. Not anything I can put my finger
on. Overall, the mCPP doesnt seem to have added anything positive that
I've noticed yet. A rough take-off seems to have been its primary
contribution. I'm fairly certain that I overdid it. With the wisdom of
hindsight, I realize that I was stupid to not sample these things
separately before trying combinations. With BZP and TFMPP, I was lucky and
had a great time. This time, I wasn't quite so lucky... although now that
the take-off is behind me, I'm feeling pretty good.

Afterword
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        Well, things took a turn for the worse after the last entry. I
began to feel almost good for a while... then a wave of horrible nausea
came over me, and I went to lay down. The next few hours were spent this
way, alternating between brief periods of "OK maybe I'm going to start
feeling OK" and long plunges into extremely toxic feelings. Intense
nausea, which never resulted in vomiting. The sensation that my blood
pressure was very high. Headache. Toxic psychosis consisting of panic
feelings and extreme paranoia, the feeling that I'd really poisoned myself
this time and was about to die. Very uncomfortable urinary retention - I
would feel like I had to pee really bad, would stumble to the toilet, and
stand there unsuccessfully - feeling worse from the effort of having
walked. Headache. A feeling that my lungs were producing too much phlegm,
although my breathing seemed OK. It was a very horrible feeling, and the
fact that time seemed to slow to a crawl didn't help a whole lot. This was
in fact probably one of the most hellish nights of my life.
        Starting around 3, I began to feel first the toxic psychosis and
soon after some of the nausea lifting. I was able to get back to my
computer and get on the chat room I had been on, to let everyone know I
was still alive (a fact I was *very* thankful for at that point!) and to
describe what had happened. I stayed online for a little over an hour at
which point I decided to lay down again, maybe even try to sleep. While
laying down, I began to feel very cold. I still felt quite nauseous. I
drifted off to sleep around 6AM, only to awaken again around 7:30AM. I
stayed in bed, and fell back asleep soon after.
        I woke up around 3:30PM with a terrible hangover. Mild but
persistent headache combined with a flu like body feeling. This lasted
through most of the day, and I didn't get out of bed until 8PM, only to
lay on the couch for 3 hours watching TV. After this, most of the worst
hangover symptoms had passed, leaving me with a mild headache and a
stiffness in my neck, which is still there now at 1AM.
        What happened? Did I massively overdose, or is mCPP (or the
combination) noxious by nature? I think a little of both. Was I in any
real physical danger or was it mostly a panic reaction? I'm not sure.
Somehow I think that a higher dose could have been risky. I can say that I
will most likely leave mCPP out of the equation indefinately. In fact,
despite my very positive first experience, I think it will be a while
before I explore any piperazines, or anything else outside the tryptamine
and phenethylamine families for that matter.