Clash of the Titans

DMT meets Ketamine

Substances: Ketamine, DMT

A momentus meeting took place last night, my friends. Within the temple of my flesh, I called a meeting between the two most powerful spirits I know - Ketamine and DMT.

Yes, yes. I know. Quite massive. Well, SOMEbody had to try it, and that someone was me.

Have I got your attention yet?

The Scene: 9:00 pm PST standard time. My house in Seattle.

I prepped by setting out the substances and their methods of delivery - the syringe for Mz. K, the pipe for Dr. D. I told them that they were finally going to meet, and to help warm over the introductions, I invited a small bowl of Lebanese hashish into my lungs to set the stage.

As the hashish wash coming on in it's own soft way, I began a hot bath, got in and made myself comfortable. Grabbing the syringe and the bottle, I drew my last 100cc of Ketamine - down to the very last drop. I held the full syringe to my forhead (no, not needle first - vertically) and began to bless the substance which it held.

"I invite you into my temple," I told it. "I invite you in because there is someone I want you to meet. It is a water spirit as well. You are both very strong, but I humbly ask that you PLAY NICE! Get the picture? Okay then."

With that out of the way, I settled into the bath and stuck myself in the left side of my chest halfway betwwen my shoulder and nipple. I took a deep breath, and with the exhale I injected the substance slowly into my chest. As I felt a tinge of pain in the muscle, I eased up and took another breath. Exhale, and now a little heavier on the plunger. Repeat for five breaths, and it was done.

I tossed the empty bottle and syringe across the floor and hit the countdown on my digital watch. The alarm would beep in 25 minutes - the meeting time.

I lay comfortably in the bath, slowly massaged the injection point, and let my mind wander. No noticeable effects for a good 7 minutes, and then it started to tug at me. I could feel my aura(?) beginning to unfold like a lotus blossom. It was flowing out from the median of my body - up and around like a blooming flower or a slowly churning fountain. I raised my legs and feet into the air and began to trace the unfloding pattern with my feet. It was a circular movement starting at my hip, with a sub-circle at my knee at another circle at my ankle. I was waving my legs in the air like a supine yogi doing an elaborate upside down dance.

My feet began to take automatic rythms, and I began learning about my body. The left side of my body (right brain) controlled the rythm - the steady beat of rationality, consistency, and reliability that ran through my life. The right side (left brain) was the sneaky zinger - the mischevious elf throwing hyper-creative dubs, samples, spins, and melodies into the mix. I practiced moving my awareness from one side of the brain to the other. The left was dull and plodding, but consistent; the right was fun and sexy, but chaotic. Each side by itself didn't add up to much - but when pulled together in unison, they were making *amazing* music.

It was at this point that the Ketamine spirit began speaking to me. It told me that I had uncovered a deep secret, and that if I ever found a way to record or reproduce this music live or in a studio, I would be making "ugly, insane, mad piles of cash," This is a direct quote. I never knew K was so hip hop, but there you go.

It suddenly dawned on me (as it has many times before in the K zone) that I was supposed to be a musician or producer of some kind, and if I could just find an agent or studio or someone to back me, I would be HUGE in no time. These are the promises K was making. It told me to take my message to the airwaves in the form of music, rake in the cash, and redistribute it in socially responsible ways.

Now I know this seems like a superficial and baseless ideal - to make lots of money - but K told me that there was nothing wrong with money. It showed me how money moved in organic patterns from person to person, and told me that it was just another resource that circulated on this planet. Like any other resource, it could be used to create, destroy, exploit, control, help, heal, etc. - it all depended on who was spending it and on what. It told me that I, and other veeples, needed to be actively controlling more resources in positive directions, and that through our example we could effect a global change of massive proportions.

Yeah, okay, nice plan, but a little short on details.

Anyhow, the 25 minute mark approached so I sat up, dried off my upper body, and grabbed the DMT pipe. I was only planning to smoke the crusty orange-white residue which clung to the insides of glass bulb, plus a tiny bit of extract that a friend had given me, but K said that this was not enough. I said "too bad," and fired up the pipe.

Because I was so immensely deep in the throws of the K zone, it was hard to tell if I was inhaling anything at all. I was trying to melt and vaporize the crystal off the inside of the pipe, but I wasn't sure if I was accomplishing anything at all. I sat sucking and licking at the pipe like a clumsy bear trying to coax the last bit of honey from a honeycomb. I was running the flame of my lighter all over the pipe, and was afraid it might heat up so badly that I would drop it in the tub. I was not having much success.

But then, my lips and the tip of my tounge began to get that chemical burning tingle which accompanies an inhalation of DMT vapor and I thought, "Well now you've done it..."

I put the pipe down and settled back into the tub, breathing deeply. "Mz K," I said, "meet Dr. D. Dr. D, meet Mz K." I could feel the DMT tingling through my head. There was a "zip-zip-zipeee-zip-zip" sound, like a swarm of incredibly fast, tiny, and dense insects rushing around my face and ears. I heard the distinct noise of giggling, laughing, and hysterical conversation, like I was fading into a scene of hyperdimensional merriment somewhere.

As I sat with closed eyes, a swirling green vortex appeared before me. It was like a dense circular field of texured vegetation eminating from a central focal point. It came out at me like a tube. I had seen similar phenomena before, and wasted no time in heading for the center. It receded as I tried to move into it, so I lifted my hand and poked directly into the center of the vortex - meaning to follow my hand as it entered. As my hand drew nearer to the center of the vortex, it began to sparkle and become alive with energy. The closer my finger got, the more excited it got. It was slowly moving downward, and as I finally hit the middle of the vortex, my finger came to rest on something soft. It was my genitals.

"Well I'll be goddamned," I said as the laughter reached a fever pitch and started to fade out. I knew right away what was going on. This was another telling of the lesson they had told me over and over again in a dozen different ways, and the lesson is this: Before we are born, we all come from a dimension removed from the physical - I refer to it as n-space, or non-physical space. There are many one-way links between physical and non-physical space - death is one and birth is another. In my longing to enter the non-physical realm and bring something back, the DMT entities showed me, again, that the most powerful way to produce something physical from the non-physical realm was through the act of sexual conception - through the act of inviting another being to enter into and share the physical realm with you. A person's sexual power is held in a spot about two inches below the belly button, and the "potential" for creation is stored in the genitals.

The giggling trailed off and the DMT was gone.

I was still in the K zone, and was compelled to smoke more DMT. The glass pipe was empty, but I suddenly realized that I still had the secret stash I had promised to Andrew just a few weeks ago. Sorry Andy, but I was suddenly overcome with a flash of "trippin' paranoia" (given the recent VPL busts and all) and decided that I needed to get rid of it - *now*. With the K finally gone, the DMT was the only thing I still had lurking about. Might as well make it a clean sweep.

I stumbled out of the bath, grabbed my robe, and began the slapstick comedy routine of searching through my house for the items I needed to retrieve the DMT from its locked and hidden stash. A key, a flashlight... I was pretty bumbly from the K, and the whole thing, in retrospect, seems pretty embarrassing. Oh well, I was on an urgent mission.

After about 5 minutes of stumbling over furniture and bumping into doorways, I had retrieved the DMT and was back in the tub (I like it there. It's warm and safe). I prepped the DMT, held it out in front of me, and said, "Okay, now show me something I don't know..."

I consumed the DMT, and this time there was no fooling around. Plenty of vapor, plenty of tingle, plenty of DMT. Before I could even drop the pipe the whole room dematerialized. The walls fell away and I found myself standing (yes, standing - gravity had shifted itself 90 degrees so I was now standing upright as opposed to being on my back) in a large green room with intricate designs and patterns along the walls. They weren't really walls, though, they were more like large curtains made of thousands of individual spikes which rolled back and forth - kind of like one of those bed-of-nails novelty toys that you can press your hand into and it leaves an imprint...

Anyway, there were other beings here! Like human beings. I could see them materializing out of the curtains. I called out, "Come out, come out and play," but they were all very slow to respond, and looking at me like they were skeptically fascinated by my presence. There was a bit of shuffling around, but then something really wierd happened - the DMT train came through.

A winding snake of what looked like white piano keys - or maybe teeth - rolled through the scene. It was snaking through the room very rapidly, and there were little beings, like cartoony bipedal rats(?), standing on top of the keyboard train dancing and singing. The train ran through with a constant rythm like this:

"Doin' it, like you're doin' it, like you're doin' it, like you're doin' it..."

And the melody on top of the rythm went like this:

When everyone's doing it, doing it
Like you're doing it
you're the MAN (yeah)

They're doing it like you're doing it
Like you're doing it
you're the man (oh yeah)

That little ditty lasted for about a full minute. And when the back of the train whipped through, there was one little cartoon rat hanging off the end of the keyboard kaboose with one hand, waving his hat(?) at me as it slid away.

And then they were gone.

I opened my eyes and I was back in the tub. The K was wearing down, the water was getting cold, the DMT was gone, but apparanty I was the man, or at least I could be if everyone was just "doing it like I'm doing it."

Or at least that's what they said.

What a night.

All contents of songs channeled by cartoon rats while on DMT remain the sole property of and are expressly copyrighted by the host channeler. ;)