Let me begin by saying that I endured all the nasties that go with taking ibogaine, but also found that the experience was most rewarding. I enjoyed most visualisations and was able to move away from ones that seemed almost frightening by concentrating on other images. I found most things in these visualisations that I focussed on would be brought forward to me (or perhaps I was drawn by what I was focussing on). The most memorable experiences were first where I felt a presence with me and asked this 'presence' "what can you tell me" I was then pulled from my body and taken out to space and the 'presence' spoke the words "It's alive" and motioned me to look towards the earth. Then I saw the earth as a living being then I said to the 'presence' "it's alive?" and it said "that's it!". Then the earth became a glowing orange ball.

The second experience I found myself in a situation where their was no mistaking the fact that I had found my place in the Universe. I was in a realm that was not visual nor can it be explained by any of the other 5 senses, but every sense I had was combined with several others that I don't normally have. I was everything and I was nothing, to use an analogy, I would have been a grain of sand in the middle of the desert and I sensed the presence of every other grain of sand and new each and everyone intimately. It was a level of understanding and totality that is beyond my comprehension in this state of consciousness.

The main reason I took Ibogaine was for my heroin addiction. Let me start by saying that I have been and still am in Jail and am receiving 1 week per month leaves of abscence. As you can imagine drugs are common place in most jails. I went into jail suffering withdrawals from methadone and enjoyed largactil as treatment making me extremely dopey and after 4 days like this I decided to go cold turkey. I was clean 4 months before taking Ibogaine and my cravings were becoming progressively less. Ibogaine changed my craving or desire for heroin to a thought that seemed irrational. So I haven't used for 2 months until yesterday where I decided to try it out of curiousity to see how i felt. Instead of enjoying the normal rush and overwhelming calmness my body felt as if it was being poisoned (it was not a dirty hit I know a dirty hit) it was my body rejecting this drug. I vomited 2 or 3 times an hour for about 5 hours and felt nauseous constantly for approxiamately 6 or 7 hours and had tremours off and on for about 5 or 6 hours. At this stage I find myself confused but let me say that I really don't feel like heroin today. I would tell people that it opens ones eyes beyond the focus of addiction.